In today’s world, no one will think negatively to someone who decides to be single parent. People will never judge someone simply because she or he is a single parent. Also, more people seem to be more supportive and help single parents when they need help. Meanwhile, there are some important issues that most single parents have to face, so that you can take these as consideration. First, you will be the one who is responsible to the household chores.
For the daily routines, such as cooking, cleaning the house, keeping the yard, and washing the dishes, there will be no significant problem. But, it will be a little bit difficult for single mother to deal with the leaking faucet or roof, changing the wallpaper, and even fixing the broken cabinet. They are considered as man’s job and very little women who are interested in handling those jobs. Hiring the persons to do these will cost some money. On the other hand, single father will also face difficulties when it is the time to deal with certain tasks associated to women’s.
Another issue is you need to find the best childcare for your children. It happens because you cannot take your children to work unless you work at home. Childcare equals to spending more money. Since it is only you as the income source, you need to be wise in choosing the best childcare. Automatically, financial becomes another issue you have to face. Try to manage your time carefully, so that you will be able to handle everything on your hand and be happy with your kids as single parent.
Although being single parents in certain culture is not considered as the good choice, the facts show that the number of single parents has risen significantly. Each person has their own reasons why they decide to be single parents. In your surrounding or town, you will be easy to see men and women who struggle to raise the kids as single parents. One reason that pops out lately is being single parent means you can decide good things for your kids yourself. No discussion or chatting needed to determine items related to your kids’ activities. You have your own right to control and educate your kids. For older kids, you can discuss and talk warmly about where to go this weekend, what sport activity to choose, why kids are forbidden to stay up late, etc.
Of course, it is not easy as it seems. Your kids will keep asking you about the existence of mother or father that is omitted in your home, especially when they are about 4-7 years old. This is the time when they start to compare the family with their friends’ at school. Surely, it will be your hard task to answer and explain the background and reasons. To ease the process, you should make sure that you are always available on your kids’ special moments. Be with them and read the story to increase the bond.
What you are not supposed to do is explaining the negative things about having complete family. For example, you tell your kids that having father is not really good due to some reasons. No!! It is totally and completely wrong!!! Your kids will not understand and keep questioning why and another why. In this case, you have to be positive and if it is possible you can take your kids to your brothers or sisters’ home. Or, visiting grandparents’ home on weekend can be done. This will make your kids have the feeling about family. Put their picture on the wall or on the desk to increase the bond and family feeling. There is nothing wrong of being single but make sure you do it positively.
Nowadays, it is more common to see single parents around the town compared to a decade ago. Both men and women have their own reasons before deciding to raise the children themselves. Whatever the reasons are, being single parents seems sometimes cannot be avoided. If this is your current situation, one thing you should have is positive way of thinking. Your mind and behavior have to be positive because you are the only role model for the children. As the one who will guide and love your children, you cannot make mistakes. Of course, this is the real challenge you have to face every day.
In addition, you need to work hard and earn enough money. Financial issue is getting more complicated for single parents because they cannot share the financial responsibility with the spouse. Single income you have should be able to cover the entire needs included education, health, and insurance. Some single parents do not think this as real problem because they create some financial sources through working in an office, selling some products online, making home products, etc. The key is creativity and keeping the sprit. Do not forget, you need to be smart shopper in getting your daily needs.
Another thing you are going to face is you will be the one who is responsible in doing all household tasks. Indeed, you can handle certain tasks like sweeping the floor, or dust the window to the older child. But, you cannot distribute the tasks like paying the bills, keeping up the yard, and cooking the meal. The point is you need to be healthy, so that you will have more energy and power to be single parent. If this is your choice, make sure you decide it wisely and comprehend the challenges.
Deciding to be single parents seems to be your toughest decision you have ever made. It means you are ready to beat the challenges and face the consequences. You are going to have extra busy days to come. Then, you need to learn the way to make priority on your life. Perhaps, this sounds easy because you have learned to prioritize something at school or college. But, you face different situation and responsibilities. You have no spouse to talk about your kids’ education and behavior. For some people, this makes them to think that they can act and be mother and father at the same time. Well, actually that is not the case. Mother has her own rules in a family and so does father. They are not interchangeable or be able to replace.
There will be a time when your kids want to have a male or female figure at home. What to do then? Having dates does not seem to be good option. Make sure your kids are getting closer to their uncle, aunty, grandma, and grandpa. Indeed, they cannot replace the existence of father or mother. But, at least your kids know more figures in the family. It is common to see a father who feels very hard to explain his daughters about female issues and gender. Aunty and grandma can be the person who may be easier in explaining such a case.
Since there is only one parental figure in the family, you have to be ready when your kids start to ask you about another figure. Of course, don’t be panic and frustrated since it is normal. The kids deserve to know why you become single parent and what you have done so far to raise the kids normally. If you have some difficulties, you may go online or go to your surroundings to find the support group for single parents. This is where you can discuss and find solution towards your problems.